To Love and Be Loved
by drama-princess
Summary: Contains spoilers! Padmé and Anakin's passionate love is soul-changing, but what price will they have to pay for it? Can the power of love keep the galaxy from ruins? A continuation of Episode II.
1. An Answer

Disclaimer: All characters are property of George Lucas. I am but a humble fan who wishes to lay her offering on the altar of Star Wars.   
  
A/N: This is my first Star Wars fic, and an AoTC inspired one at that. Anakin/Amidala pairing, it follows their marriage and may go into an AU Episode III. I hope you enjoy this and the following chapters, and I only ask that if you do, please leave a review. Thank you!   
  
Dedicated to my darling GRRR's, and to Chelsey, who sparked the idea in the first place.   
  


To Love and Be Loved  


  
  
Chapter 1: An Answer  
  
They tell me that I must not love,  
That thou wilt spurn the free  
And unbought tenderness that gives  
Its hidden wealth to thee.  
It may be so: I heed it not,  
Nor would I change my blissful lot.   
  
~Love Unsought, by Emma B. Embury  
  
The gently rolling waves of the lake glittered in the sunset. Softly golden light illuminated the elegant curves of the railing, and a sensual floral perfume drifted on the breeze. Anakin Skywalker glanced down at his new hand, studying the way the light seemed to make it come alive. Unconciously, he rubbed the smooth plasteel as he gazed off into Naboo's horizon. The path that had brought him to Padmé had been a twisting one, marked with pain and uncertainty. His heart ached for her with each breath. He longed to kiss her again, to trace the delicate curves of her face, and watch his reflection in her eyes. The sweetness of her smile stirred awake the passion that had laid repressed in his soul for so long.   
  
The Jedi code that gave faith to so many across the galaxy only hurt Anakin. He remembered countless repetitions of the code from Obi-Wan, and the thought sent a stab of guilty pain through him. The older man was constantly critical and cautious, but the real affection that lay beneath his rigid demeanour did not go unnoticed by Anakin. But he was past caring what anyone in Jedi order said now. The time for thought had slipped past him in one, heedless moment when Padmé's eyes had flashed up to meet his, and their souls had met. Passion dissolved any rigorous objections that others would have held. So when they'd been standing together on a balcony on Coruscant. watching the smoky evening life rush past beneath them, Anakin had taken her hand in his good one. The scene came back to Anakin with all the beauty of the original moment, and he held the elusive memory in his mind for a long moment.   
  
Padmé watched him carefully as he studied her hand. Her slim fingers nestled in his palm, and she brushed her fingers over the light calluses on his hand. It was delicately expressive, and seemed to express the gentle power that Anakin held in his soul. She laid her head on his shoulder as he drew her closer into his embrace. She could feel the slow, steady rhythm of his breath against her body, and the warm, tender scent of him encircled her. How she loved him. Loved him with every fiber of her being, shot through with flame and passion.   
  
he whispered, his lips brushing her ear as he said her name. The word caressed the air for a brief moment, and then slowly lingered on as she turned to look at him. Timidly, she reached up and brushed her hand across his cheek. He caught her hand and kissed it softly, his lips barely touching her skin.   
  
I love you, she said softly, her dusky eyelashes briefly descending on her cheek. Anakin caught her chin and raised it to face him. His eyes slowly moved over her high cheekbones, the winged arches of her eyebrows, and those soft, full lips that he loved. He bent to kiss her lightly, but as Padmé wrapped her arms around him, deepening the kiss and embrace. The rushes of the airspeeders dimmed as they moved back towards Padmé's suite. She ran her hands over his shoulders, her eyes fixed on his.   
  
Anakin, tomorrow you escort me back to Naboo, she murmured, her heart aching at the words. The cold loneliness of her world when Anakin left it would be permanent, relieved only by a few hasty communications and wistful looks that they could steal away from their duties. A wave of fear and pain overtook her, and a pearly tear fell lightly onto her cheek. Anakin pressed his lips together, his finger gliding up her face to check the wayward sign of sorrow.   
  
Don't cry, my love, he said softly, even as he felt the beginnings of tears in his eyes. To lose Padmé now, the woman who was his heart, his soul, would be like ripping the world away from him. To be forever exiled from her love and confined to a solitary life of meditation repulsed him. For the first time, he thought he understood the brief traces of longing he'd seen in Qui-Gon's eyes, and knew why Obi-Wan sometimes watched Coruscant's sunsets silently, his hands gripping the railing tightly. He couldn't do it. Couldn't end up like another empty shell of a Jedi, living only for the gentle flow of the Force.   
  
I can't let you go, he whispered fiercely, holding her tightly against him. Padmé gave a dry sob as she buried her face in his shoulders, her fingers digging into the fabric of his tunice. Padmé, I can't. Please don't ask it of me, my love.   
  
she said helplessly, her voice choked with tears. It's not me that asks it. It's the rest of the galaxy. The Senate. The Order. I can't ask you to leave--  
  
I don't care. Anakin's voice was desperate as he drew back and held her hand tightly. I don't care about the Order, Padmé. It's you I want. Padmé's tears flowed freely down her face as she looked down at his mechanical hand. He'd sacrificed so much to become his Jedi. He'd left his tender-hearted mother behind, his childish shoulders straight even as his face crumpled in agony. He'd dedicated his life to learning to weave his powers in the tapestry of the Force, and to leave that all behind would be a crime. Padmé shook her head. She couldn't let him.   
  
Just you, Anakin finished. He looked at her pleadingly. Padmé, I--   
  
She pressed her fingers to his lips, her hand reaching around the pocket of her dressing gown as she did so. Anakin's eyes followed her every move as she drew out a small package wrapped in Alderaanian silk. The watery folds of the fabric fell gracelessly to the ground as she held out the small amulet that he had carved for her so many years ago.   
  
Do you remember? she asked him, feeling the hushed twilight around them both. Anakin took the trinket in his hand, turning it over and over. I'll never forget you, Ani, she continued, her voice trembling with pain. I never could. I never knew why I kept this all these years, but now I do. Anakin, I could never-- Anakin's eyes met hers in an intense gaze, and she bit her lower lip to keep herself from weeping outright.   
  
Padmé, you don't have to. He straightened, his eyes falling on her with all the swift passion he held. The barriers life had imposed on them both fell away at the touch of love. They could no more stop him from loving Padmé than take away his connection to the Force. It was part of him now. He couldn't let their intereference halt the natural sway of life.   
  
Padmé searched his face, her hands sliding down his arms as she did so. Her breath caught in her throat, and she felt a thrill of pure joy run through her at his next words.  
  
Will you marry me? he asked her softly, touching a tendril of loose hair that kissed the side of her face. Stay with me forever?   
  
Padmé hesitated before giving into the desperate desires of her soul. They couldn't, they couldn't, it would be too hard, it wouldn't work. But as she remembered the sweetness of their kisses on the pastoral grasses of Naboo, and laughing, the touching, the hoping, she knew that she'd found the one thing she couldn't ever give up.   
  
Love.  
  
  



	2. A Dream

Chapter 2: A Dream  
  
Twas summer, and the spot a cool retreat--  
Where curious eyes came not, nor footstep rude  
Disturbed the lovers' chosen solitude.  
This stream's thy heart,' said I, Love's touch alone  
Can change it to the fount which maketh green my own.  
  
~A Dream, by Elizabeth Clementine Kinney  
  
The faint whirring of C-3PO's servomotors drew Anakin away from the past and into the impulsive sweetness of the moment. He glanced over at the droids, standing in all the glory and shine an oil bath could give them. The holy man that was to marry them stood silently nearby, watching the golden tinge of the sunset over the lake. He wondered, briefly and intensely, what Padmé was doing in the last, lingering moments before their marriage.   
  
Padmé stood before her gilded mirror in her wedding gown, her fingers absently running over the pearled headdress. The dress had been her mother's before her. She remembered her mother placing it in the rustling folds of paper for her only child's wedding day. Padmé reached out to her reflection and rested her hand on the mirror. She could see her mother's face-- a coarser, darker version of her own-- before her even now. She missed her terribly, with a cold, dull ache that seemed to intensify day by day. The memory of her parents was but faintly imprinted on her mind, and would sometimes whisper away into the fluttering currents of the mind. But she remembered kind, gentle hands, and loving voices with all her heart. Perhaps that was why she had been drawn to Anakin in the first place. The loss of her own mother had given her a kindred affinity with Anakin's pain.   
  
Padmé brushed a hand down her gown, feeling the way the ivory silk clung languidly to her body. She vividly remembered the feeling of Anakin's fingers on her skin, and the fearful thrill that had run through her that fateful day by the lake. The near transparent pattern of lace that enveloped her shoulders hung loosely, afraid to touch the skin he had called so soft and smooth.   
  
Her mother seemed very close to her in this last, sacred breath of maidenhood. Padmé's hand curled around the jewels on the veil, and she slowly raised it to cover her hair. It fit snugly over her rippling curls, bringing lacy scallops to lie along the side of her face. Padmé shut her eyes slowly and then opened them, watching closely for the inevitable changes of the soul that would have been wrought on her face.   
  
Before her stood another woman, one who had blossomed into life under the the warmth of Anakin's love. Padmé reached out and touched the mirror again, to be certain of the vision she saw. Her dark eyes seemed smoky, her lips fuller than she had ever seen them before. The delicacy of her features was sharply drawn, more so than she'd ever seen it. She stood, the train of her gown drifting behind her, and went to the door to embrace her destiny, whatever it would be.   
  
Anakin turned the moment she entered, and held a hand out for her. Her eyes met his questioningly, and all doubts were swept away as he drew her closer. The holy man opened his old-fashioned book, and began to read. Anakin's eyes were fastened on hers, learning the secrets of her soul with that piercing gaze. Her gaze was fearless and filled with love. She remembered faintly telling her best friend that if she ever married, she would have an elaborate wedding in the capital of Naboo with all her friends around her. Never would she have dreamed of a hurried, secretive wedding in a solitary retreat. But fate-- the Force, as Anakin would say-- had led her down such a different path.   
  
Padmé Amidala and Anakin Skywalker, the service began, his voice rising and falling in gentle waves of tone. You have come here today to swear your lifelong vows of love and honor. To marry is to devote your life solely to the other. There is no selfish ambition; no vanity that will cloud this marriage. Now you will no longer be separate entities under the law. You will have sworn to protect and care for each other as you would care for yourself. As surely as the sun rises on our planet each morning, blessing the land with golden rays of life, your love will illuminate your days. There will be times as stormy as the tempests that shake our seas, but you will keep your course together. Padmé felt a thrill run through her at the words. She'd heard the ancient vows spoken many times before, but never had they meant anything to her. Now they were her world.   
  
Anakin Skywalker, will you swear to this bond? Anakin nodded, his tall shoulders proud and straight as he spoke. His focus drifted inward as he remembered the vow he had written on the journey here. Padmé had never heard it, nor had he heard hers.   
  
Jedi Knights are forbidden to love, and I take these vows knowing that they may expel me from the Order that has been my life. It is not that I do not care, but that I am following the will of the Force that guides me through life. It has brought me to you as surely as it has taken me throughout the galaxy under the tutelage of my master. There is a higher mandate than the Council, Padmé, and I will answer to it. It is your love, the love that we have found together. From this moment, Padmé, I swear that I will always be strong for you-- love you, protect you, and live for you as I would have you live for me. You will want for nothing as my wife, and I swear this on the Code I have and always will live by.   
  
Padmé felt the start of a tear in her eyes as Anakin spoke, his voice stirred with the depths of passion. Her heart cried with fearful joy at the sound of his voice and the words he spoke. He was ready to promise her everything.   
  
Padmé Amidala, will you swear to this bond? Padmé tore her eyes away from Anakin to glance at the holy man. A soft breeze whispered in the trees, and she nodded.   
  
I will. Anakin smiled softly at her, the joy that he felt at her words flooding through her through their bond their minds had formed. It was a peculiar, one-sided communication through which Padmé's thoughts and feelings flowed. Anakin swore to himself that he would be worthy of the gifts she had given him. He would not fail her like he had failed his mother. She took a breath carefully, drawing it in, and then began her promises.   
  
I, Padmé Amidala, swear by all that is holy and good, that I will love and honor you, Anakin, as I would the commandments of my own soul. You are the missing half of my heart, and when I come to you, I am complete, as nothing else have ever fulfilled me. I know that the galaxy is opposed to our love, but there are some things greater than rules and procedures, and that is why I love you. I have fought my whole life for the ideals in which I believe, and this is but the beginning. Circumstances may draw us apart for long periods of time, but I will always be by your side, waiting for you to turn to me. I will love you as you have loved me-- wholly, completely, without reserve. You have given me the greatest gift this life holds, Anakin. You have taught me how to love and be loved in return.   
  
And so, the holy man finished, feeling a little caught up in the moment in spite of himself. Rarely did anyone make their vows with so much fervor and eloquence as these two young people, so obviously full of beauty and potential. Your bond is sealed, under the rites of the Naboo people and the dictates of the universe. Padmé, I give you Anakin. Anakin, I give you Padmé. May you seek to honor the promises you have given each other today. With a graceful gesturing of his hands, he stepped out of the way as Anakin and Padmé drew closer to each other. Their hands met timidly at first as their lips brushed in the sweetest kiss. Their eyes were shut, breathing in each other, feeling the softness of each other. They stayed there for a long moment, drinking in their love and feeling the first moments of their marriage.   
  
Anakin tightened his grip on Padmé's hand as they drew apart and turned to face the horizon together. He wouldn't fail her. He would protect the woman he loved. As he stared fiercely off into the sunset, he swore again to himself that he would become the most powerful Jedi to care for her. He knew that the Jedi's powers were slipping away in the face of evil. He would not risk losing Padmé. He would rise above the rest to keep her with him. He would keep his dream safe.   
  
Padmé felt a sudden, unaccountable wave of fear. The waves bled out onto the shores as they were shot with rifts of light, and the sun sank slowly out of view. Perhaps it had a mistake to marry at sunset instead of sunrise, as the day came to a close instead of offering new hope. Was this an omen that the dream they were now living could not last long? 


	3. A Love

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! They're all really lovely-- and you guys are marvelous for leaving them! Thank you! A bit of a warning for the next chapter-- it's still PG-13, but it deals with Padmé and Anakin's wedding night. I've handled it as tastefully as I know how, but if you think you might get offended, please don't read. Thanks!  
  
Chapter 3: A Love  
  
Underneath my stiffened gown  
Is the softness of a woman bathing in a marble basin,  
A basin in the midst of hedges grown  
So thick, she cannot see her lover hiding,  
But she guesses he is near,  
And the sliding of the water  
Seems the stroking of a dear  
Hand upon her.   
  
~Patterns, by Amy Lowell  
  
  
  
Anakin stood in the doorway of her room, his eyes focused on her. She turned, a faint blush appearing on her cheeks as she saw him. Anakin watched her as she stood gracefully, the long skirt of her dressing gown falling down in a smooth ripple of embroidered fabric. She did not move to greet him right away, but lit a candle, her head bowed over the flame as her trembling fingers brought the light into being. He remembered the first time he had seen her in that gown. She had stepped out onto the balcony, her dark eyes alight with concern. She had heard him cry out in the night, and with the instinctive kindness she held, had gone to try and comfort him in the morning.   
  
When Padmé came into the room, it was as if a light veil was thrown over all his troubles, calming them with a feathery touch. Her own emotions were like light that danced over a forest floor, throwing beautiful patterns onto the ground. She didn't seem nearly as calm now. Her thoughts surged and bubbled around his, sometimes a plea for help, sometimes an aloof glance. Padmé folded her arms, enfolding her body in that stiff gown. She seemed to be waiting for him.   
  
Padmé felt her mouth go dry at Anakin's presence in her room. He wore a thin, raw silk shirt that clung to his chest and shoulders and hung open at the top. His pants lay smoothly against his long legs, and his leather boots had been tossed onto the floor. She felt a sudden stir of desire beneath her calm facade. Anakin had the power to make her feel as though she was running madly down a hill, her garments streaming behind her as she struggled to win a race. Her face flushed again, stirring a pool of crimson in her cheek. She bit her lower lip shyly and took a step closer to him. Anakin raised a hand to her face, running his hand over the curves of cheek and lip. He hesitated for a long moment before brushing his fingers lightly down her chin and slender neck, to touch where her robe met bare skin.   
  
She reached up to kiss him, her arms drawing him close to her. She could feel the rhythm of his breath, the warmth of his body. Anakin responded, bringing her into his good arm so they stood there, illuminated by a shaft of moonlight, together.   
  
Anakin whispered, his hand running down her shoulder. Padmé felt a shudder run down her spine at his touch. Slowly, carefully, he tugged at the collar of her gown, freeing her arms from its confines. She watched him, breathless, as the heavy sleeves revealed her skin. In the candlelight, her pale golden skin was rich and darker, lending a brilliance to her chestnut hair and dark eyes. She shook her hands free of the last bind of the gown, and brought her hands up to Anakin's shoulder. He gathered her up in his arms, carrying her over to the bed. Padmé couldn't help but notice how he avoided touching her with the droid arm. He used it only to lightly support her legs, while her head and neck lay against his warm skin. Her heart hurt for him. She loved all of him, regardless of whatever sacrifices his body had laid down for what was right.   
  
She brought Anakin down to the bed with her, kissing him with a slow desperation that seemed to slow the passage of time itself. Her body and soul ached to be with his. Anakin ran his hand through her hair, fingering the delicate curls that lay on a darkened heap on her pillow. She slid her hands up his chest, slowly pushing his shirt to his waist. He kissed the hollow at the base of her throat, trailing a stream of fire down to where her nightgown curved up to into a slim strap. His eyes met hers questioningly, and she nodded, her breath catching in her throat.   
  
They spent the better part of the night making love, slowly, surely, discovering where touches made their bodies sing and souls weak. The soft light of dusk faded into the blackness of night, the stars brilliantly revealing themselves and dancing behind blue wisps of cloud. The candles burned down, leaving the room lit only by the heavens. As Anakin kissed her lips, hands, face, and body, Padmé remembered each of her favorite stars in Naboo's sky, picturing each glittering for them both, blessing their love. Anakin thought of the way the light spilled out onto the desert sands of Tatooine at night, like a rare wine that slipped from a woman's goblet, winding paths on the golden grains. A soft breeze blew in from the window, laden with the scents of the gardens and the lake. At one point, she raised Anakin's hand to the starlit beams, studying the callouses, and gently pressing her lips over his fingers.   
  
Later, as they lay exhausted together on the bed, Padmé laid her hand on Anakin's stomach, feeling the rise and fall of his breath. She turned her head slowly, burying her face in his arm. He was not asleep yet-- she could feel his alertness, as if the night was not yet complete. There was something left to be said.   
  
she whispered, her lips and tongue and teeth forming the name she loved. He turned to her, his eyes searching for what she would say.   
  
  
  
I've never felt this close to anyone before, she said softly, her words carefully measured. Ever. And it frightens me, Ani. What is I were to lose you? Anakin did not reply for a long moment, but ran his hand slowly over her bare shoulder. Her words cut into him with their fear. What would happen if he couldn't be with her? It would be far, far worse than taking his arm, or any other injury that the universe could inflict on his body. It would be ripping his heart away from him, bleeding into the empty distance of solitude.   
  
You won't lose me, he said finally. I swear, Padmé.  
  
People die, Anakin, she said calmly, reminding him of all the pain and death they had seen lately. Even Jedi.   
  
I won't, Anakin said grimly. I swear to you, Padmé Amidala Skywalker, that I will never leave you. His voice caught for a moment, and she realized that he was remembering his mother. I swear to you, Padmé. Padmé kissed his shoulder lightly.   
  
I love you, she whispered, feeling sleep tug at her eyelids. Anakin pressed his fingers to his lips and onto hers.   
  
I know, he responded. His hand then tugged the woven blanket around them both. Sleep now, love.   
  
Will I see you there? Padmé whispered as she sank into the comforting warmth of his body and sleep. She closed her eyes, and her hand settled on his, keeping him close to her.   
  
He meant to join her in rest immediately, but something kept him awake for a few minutes, and he lay there, studying the lacy patterns of the canopy bed. He loved her. Oh, Force, he loved her with every ounce of his soul and body. Was love always enough, though? In the stories his mother had told him, it was. They always lived to be secure in their love and faith in each other. But the galaxy was a dangerous place now. He could not rely on love to keep them safe. He would have to be strong for Padmé now. He could no longer let things pass by him in the name of the Force. He had to fight battles, become even more powerful.   
  
Anakin Skywalker decided in that moment that there would be no more holding back. He had the power to keep by which he swore holy, and at that moment, he knew that he would guard his treasures with a fierceness that the Jedi had never dared to see before. 


	4. A Journey

A/N: Thank you all for the wonderful reviews! May you all see Episode III in advance screenings! (Alas, if only I had the power to do such a thing for you all) I picked up the novelization the other day, and realized Padmé's family isn't dead, but this is a mostly A/U fic anyway, so it doesn't trouble me that much. Read, enjoy, and please review! Thanks!  
  
  
Chapter 4: A Journey  
It lies not in our power to love or hate  
For will in us is overruled by fate.   
~Whoever Loved, That Loved Not at First Sight? by Christopher Marlowe  
  
Anakin stood at the edge of the landing platform, feeling the wind pull at his Padwan braid, as if trying to rip away from him. An omen, he wondered grimly as he pressed his palms against his legs. The cold touch of his mechanical hand bled through him, and he glared down at the thing, his lip curling with anger as he did so. He still remembered the hot touch of Dooku's lightsaber, searing through muscle and skin, cauterizing the wound even as he inflicted it. The overwhelming mass of pain had been conquered only by his own fury at the Sith's evil.   
  
With an effot, Anakin turned his thoughts away from the past and to his wife. He was waiting for Padmé to return from the capitol, where she'd spent the past several hours talking to Queen Jamilla. Padmé had assured him that she'd be spending more time on Coruscant anyway, with the creation of the new army, so it wouldn't be too much of a problem for her to rise above her duties on Naboo.   
  
If they don't expel me, he said bitterly, glaring out at the smooth lines of spacecraft and angry horizon. It was absurd, to threaten someone as powerful as him with expulsion from the Order if they happened to fall in love. They were all fools if they banished him from the way of the Jedi. He was the most promising apprentice-- the Chosen One, for Force's sake. If the Council--  
  
Padmé's voice melted through his icy thoughts, and he turned to see her standing there in full Senate regalia. His eyes narrowed with puzzlement when he saw the cases in her hands.   
  
What is it? he asked, going over to her and pressing her hand against his heart. She glanced down and smiled softly, the curves of her mouth rising sweetly. You're coming? I thought they needed you here for a time longer. He glanced down at the rigid lines of her violet gown, the tight bindings that contained her flowing hair, and his heart sank a little. He wanted to remember Padmé as she really was, not the cold politican, but the warm, vital woman who laughed in a field or stood, beautiful in her fury, on a battlefield, determined to defend what she held dear. Padmé seemed to read his thoughts, and she responded with a wry smile and a quick caress.   
  
It is only in the day, Anakin, she reminded him simply. Night is a different matter. She blushed, her dark eyes conveying a different meaning than what her innocent words suggested. Anakin smiled at her in return, brushing a finger down her cheek. Besides, it would be a good-- idea-- she continued, a little haltingly, as his finger continued its journey. To-- Anakin-- She was finally silenced by his fingers on her mouth.   
  
he whispered, casting a glance to make sure that there was no one else around. Drawing her close to him, he felt her body contour to his underneath the heavy brocade. Padmé reached her arms up and kissed him deeply. They broke away a long moment later, gasping slightly for breath. Anakin kissed her nose and took one of her cases. Thank you.   
  
For what? she asked as he tucked his good arm around her waist. She leaned into his shoulder, teasing him a little with her presence. He sent her back an easy grin in return, and she thrilled to see how much calmer he was with her. Maybe she was soothing to him, she thought dreamily, remembering that morning on the balcony.   
  
For coming. I don't want to go alone. Padmé's returning gaze was meaningful, making Anakin blush this time. She held his gaze for a few moments longer before they laughed together. Anakin felt his frustrations clear in her company as easily as silver rain purified the clouds. He ran a hand down her arm as they boarded the ship. I really didn't want to go alone.   
  
I didn't want you to either, she said demurely, folding her hands as she sat down. She looked up at him, a crooked smile resting on her mouth. The Queen understood that. Marriage is still held sacred on Naboo, you know.   
  
Unlike the rest of the galaxy? Anakin suggested dryly, stowing the cases away. Artoo whistled up into the ship, and he tossed him a quick salute.   
  
Something like that, Padmé conceded, holding a a hand out to the little droid. Hello, Artoo. Where's Threepio?   
  
Oh, dear, a prim, very inner-world voice floated into the ship. I do say, Artoo, that Master Anakin's ship will be a great deal safer than those awful transports. Padmé and Anakin shared a quick laugh and he touched her cheek briefly before going to the cabin to strap in.   
  
Do all your handmaidens get to retire once you're married, Padmé? he called back to her, his hands deftly making the calculations for liftoff and the jump to hyperspace.   
  
No, of course not, Padmé replied, checking a datapad for the news briefing from Coruscant as she spoke. I feel-- as does Captain Typho-- that it will be safer for me to travel with you in an unidentified ship with you while everyone else comes in an official vessel. They both subsided into silence while Anakin lifted off and Padmé studied the latest news from the Senate. She was still sitting there, a frown creasing her forehead, when Anakin walked back in. He stood there for a full minute before speaking, waiting for Padmé to notice him. Finally she glanced up and smiled quickly, but he saw that the real mirth was gone.   
  
What is it? Anakin asked gently, sitting down next to her. Padmé tapped the edge of the datapad.   
  
There have been anti-war demonstrations on Coruscant, she said slowly, biting her lower lip as she spoke. Republic Police have responded with unecessary force to contain the rebellious demonstrators. Anakin raised a doubtful eyebrow at the article.   
  
Padmé, I can't imagine the Chancellor agreeing to let peaceful protestors be hurt. They must have been disturbing the peace, destroying things. Padmé frowned.   
  
I don't know, Anakin. Chancellor Palpatine is a good man, I agree, but he is not infalliable. And . . . she hesitated, and Anakin immediately noticed.   
  
And what, Padmé? She shook her head slowly.   
  
I don't know. This military troubles me greatly. Bail Organa is quoted, saying that he supports the Republic with all his heart, but says nothing about the army. That's not like Bail, to keep silent against what offends him.   
  
He's from Alderaan, Anakin pointed out, a note of derision appearing in his voice. They're too soft, Padmé. They haven't had troubles like other planets have. Look at how Jar Jar supported the army in the Senate. He knows-- like everyone else from Naboo-- what terrible things to evil can do when there is nothing to counter it. You should know that. Padmé narrowed her eyes at him, trying to understand what he was really saying. He tried to place his arm around her shoulders, but she twisted away to face the wall.   
  
Are you suggesting that I've been wrong in opposing the military all this time, Anakin? Take a look at history, she cried, her voice rising as she became increasingly passionate. Every time there has been power, there will be corruption. And suffice it to say that I should know the Senate far better than you do. There's been a reason that I've been doing this, Anakin. They glared at each other for a long moment, then Anakin's face softened and he glanced away.   
  
I'm sorry, Padmé, he said, tenatively trying to embrace her again. I didn't mean to say that you were wrong. I was just-- the army saved us on Genosis, love. His voice was pleading. She felt her heart soften and dropped her shoulders from the haughty posture they were held in.   
  
I know, she sighed, leaning against him cautiously, as not to disturb her hair. I know. I'm sorry too. It's just that we're facing troubling times, Ani. She shook her head slowly. I'm going to go change.   
  
Anakin began, holding fast to her hand. She turned slowly, a look of impatience crossing her face. I love you. Padmé smiled, and the tension in the room crept away, sensing that it was no longer welcome.   
  
I love you too. 


End file.
